


Two Hearts, and a bottle of Whisky

by proseoflife



Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-10
Updated: 2015-08-07
Packaged: 2018-04-08 15:19:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4310235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proseoflife/pseuds/proseoflife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU<br/>Cosima meets Delphine. Sort of.<br/>Delphine has a boyfriend. Sort of.<br/>Both points of view. Sort of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

Whoa buddy, I know I haven’t checked in for the past couple of weeks but things are totally crazy hectic at the moment. I have this new killer professor Dr Leekie, who completely kicks my ass (in a totes good way obvs) in my Evo Devo classes. His classes are so captivating, and he is such a badass speaker. I love his classes the most, but boy does he really challenge the mind. Which is why I haven’t spoken to you in awhile. Soz about that.

I’ve decided, after our last conversation, that I’m going to move in with Felix. It makes sense. Two stoners, living large and keeping it real. Oh god, I just rolled my eyes at how lame that sounded. You’re right. You’re always right. But it’ll save me a few dollars, and I like his company. Him and I…well, we’re of the same people you know? Plus after my break-up with spawn-of-satan Shay, I really could use the distraction.

Speaking of distractions, I met someone.

Well, okay, I haven’t met her met her…but there’s someone. I just have no idea how to meet her. I mean, do I accidentally but on purpose bump into her? And then what do I do? Tell her my name, and then ramble on like a complete dork about how I’ve been gawking at her for the past 2 weeks?

Okay, okay, I’ll back up a bit.

Felix, Sarah, and I were all having a couple of drinks downstairs at Fee’s loft. Our usual Friday catch-up. So, I go up to the bar and I notice someone new behind the bar. She was wearing this white tank, and to be honest I don’t think she was wearing a bra – but everything was so perky, and so very distracting. I was so distracted that I didn’t even notice Bobby calling my name. Man, I felt so embarrassed, and Bobby gave me her knowing eye and shook her head in disapproval. My cheeks went seven different colours of red, I swear to god. I felt 2 centimetres tall in that moment.

Don’t ask me what her name is, because I’m too chicken-shit to just ask her. In fact, I haven’t even spoken to her per se. I haven’t done much except act like a horny 12 year old boy around her, and gawk at her. Both Sarah and Felix give me shit about it all the time, obviously. They’re so annoying like that, but I’d be lost without them. They’ve been good people, you know? Through everything. Through my health scare, to my tumultuous, soul-destroying relationship, to me not having enough time for them, but them knowing that I still love them no matter what. They’re good people. They’re the best, and I don’t know where – or even who I’d be without them.

You’re probably wondering if the real reason I’m moving in with Felix is so I can gawk at the hot mysterious bartender some more, right? Well, you’re wrong!

Okay, you got me.

Maybe a little bit.

Ah crap, I think puberty is re-hitting me and I’m turning into a boy.

Oh, I got a postcard from my parents on their “I sold everything to buy a campervan and pack up to live freely amongst nature” roadtrip. They’re in Vegas. My parents packed up all their stuff to go to Vegas? I mean, come on. Vegas? Yeah sure, it’s the middle of the desert, but of all the places that could see, they chose to start in Vegas? Ah well, good for them I say. I gave them a call straight after and told them to put their life savings on black.

Shit, hope they knew I was kidding.

Oh god damn it, I’m going to have to call them aren’t I?

Promise I’ll write soon.

Over & out.

CN


	2. Deux

It had been just over two months since Delphine Cormier had moved her life from one side of the ocean to another. She had left everything she knew behind in Paris for America. A good job, her loving and caring parents, her beautiful friends, and a boyfriend that she loved. It was something she had always wanted to do, ever since she was a child. She wanted to explore the brave new world, and America had always seemed to be the place she wanted to explore.

By sheer luck and chance she managed to score a job as a bartender at Bobby’s Bar. They were hiring, and she had the experience. Although, bartending wasn’t actually what Delphine did back home, but she knew she would have to take any job she could get her hands on. Especially if she wanted to make a real go at her new life in America.

Growing up her parents instilled in Delphine one motto: 

Il y a deux cadeaux que nous devrions offrir a nos enfants. Le premier; des racines et le second: des ailes. There are two gifts we should give our children: one is roots and the other is wings.

Delphine knew where her home was, but her heart was somewhere entirely different. She never questioned it, she only followed it. 

When her very best friend Alison Hendrix moved over to Minnesota, Delphine knew this was her opportunity to follow what her heart had been telling her for all of those years. Alison scored a scholarship at the University in Minnesota, and Delphine jumped at the chance to join her. It was going to be difficult, she knew that, but she also knew that with her best friend by her side, anything was possible.

5 months after Alison moved, Delphine packed her things, said her goodbyes and joined her in Minnesota, U.S.A. When the plane landed, Delphine took a deep breath, looked around at her new surroundings, and told herself: Suivez vos rêves – follow your dreams. Something she would keep telling herself over and over again.

They lived in a tiny off-campus flat, which was close to the University for Alison, but about 45 minutes away from the bar where Delphine now worked. Though, that didn’t seem to faze Delphine. She liked the idea of getting herself familiar with her new home, in her new city, in her new country. Which meant getting lost a lot, but that was the whole point of exploring and discovering.

Delphine met Bobby, who owned Bobby’s Bar, when she was taking a casual stroll through her new city. Really, though, she had been lost for over two hours trying to get to an interview for another job when she finally conceded defeat. She plumped herself down on a seat just opposite the park, and decided to have a cigarette instead. Delphine had quit smoking almost 3 years ago, but decided now was a good a time as any to start it back up again, when suddenly an American girl – who seemed out of breath – had asked her for a light.

Bobby, who had been going for a run that day, had introduced herself to Delphine after she was handed a lighter. They sat and smoked their cigarettes, whilst the irony didn’t go over either of their heads about Bobby jogging and then also smoking. Bobby told Delphine that her bar was really busy over the weekends, and that she was looking for someone who didn’t want a 1-week-only job. Delphine got the impression that all of Bobby’s staff had come and gone quickly, mostly undergrads who were probably only looking for the flexibility. She couldn’t believe her luck at how missing one job offer led her to another job with, by the look of things, someone she would grow to consider her first American friend.

Her first ever job back home in Paris, was pouring drinks at an exclusive French bar, where the top executives and businessmen would come during work hours, after work hours, sometimes even before work hours. It was her father’s establishment, which was left to him by his father. Pouring drinks wasn’t unfamiliar to Delphine, but the clientele was – somewhat – different.

She noticed there were a few regular drinkers at Bobby’s Bar. One of them was am extremely flamboyant man, couldn’t have been more than 22 or 23 years old. His name was Felix, which she learnt from when Bobby started pouring him a Guinness before he even got to the bar to order it. There was a girl with Felix, who Delphine thought had strange and peculiar hair. Wasn’t sure of her name, as Bobby hadn’t said it, but it looked like they all knew each other.

After her first week working for Bobby, Delphine knew things were starting to really come together for her. But, she missed her boyfriend Olivier. She missed his warmth, and his comfort. But mainly, she missed the sex.


	3. Three

“Oww my oww!” Cosima cried in agony, having accidentally kicked her foot on her bedside table that she and Felix had only just re-assembled.

“Fuck this, I’m going for a smoke” she huffed, strutting past her new room-mate with determination. She was determined she wasn’t going to let the past 3 hours of moving get the better of her, but she was slowly tiring and her _I’m-on-top-of-the-world_ façade was fading.

“Oh good” Felix squealed with enthusiasm, “A celebratory puff on the good ol’ hippie herb”

Cosima couldn’t help but laugh at her friend’s euphemism, “as long as I can roll…” she said.

Felix rolled his eyes and grabbed the pouch from the top drawer. He liked to keep his stash of goodness (as Cosima preferred to call it) in the same place in his loft. It was a small, maybe even medium sized, 2 drawer table that he built and painted in his artwork. It was covered in candid snap shots of lovers (past and current) to outlines and stencils of the male form. It was Felix’s pride and joy, but all of his art-work was.

“Fine” he drawled out dramatically. “But I get first puff.”

Felix’s loft was 4 flights of stairs with no elevator above Bobby’s bar. There is no direct access into the bar from the apartments itself, which Felix often protested to Bobby about. Especially on his drunken escapades where stumbling out of the bar and having to make a sharp left turn, and then another left turn into the apartment complex seemed all a little too much effort for him. Then there were _those_ stairs.

Cosima was always very particular with how she liked to roll her joints. It was another form of expression, or art, the way Cosima saw life really. When she was 16, the girl next door Alex, opened her eyes to pot. For her, it wasn’t a matter of doing it to _rebel against her parents_ , or because _everyone else was doing it_ , it was because she had a huge crush on Alex and she would do anything Alex said. That night, Cosima smoked her first joint and had sex for the first time. _The night of firsts_ , is what it’s collectively known as in her journal entry.

Whilst Felix didn’t mind smoking weed in any form, either through a pipe or even a bong, Cosima would only ever roll a joint. She didn’t want the experience to be rushed, and the only way she felt that she could truly appreciate smoking pot was through the whole process she created of chopping, rolling, and smoking. It was a pseudo-sacred act for Cosima.

“Thank the gay gods you’re finally done” Felix wide-eyed stated matter-of-factly. Patience was never his thing. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, though, Cosima did know how to roll the perfect joint – tightly packed, and big enough for two.

She watched her friend inhale from the freshly lit joint, and quietly smiled to herself. It truly was the perfect day, even if the past couple of hours seemed to be dragging on. A stray dreadlock fell to her face, and she tucked it behind her ear, not really caring what her appearance was in this moment. She knew she must have looked the way she was feeling – completely drained and exhausted. But the day was beautiful, the sun was out and shining down on them. You couldn’t help but feel the bold warmth of the glowing rays above.

“Oi, you havin’ some?” Felix asked, passing over the lit joint.

Cosima took the smoke from Felix, and put it to her lips. “You know…” she paused, trying to truly think of the next words she wanted to say. “Thank you Felix.”

“What for?” he asked, puzzled by what seemed to be an out-of-nowhere comments.

The dreaded girl shrugged. She didn’t really know where that thank-you came from. Maybe it was his friendship she was thanking him for, especially when he was the type of friend who absolutely loved her ex-girlfriend but as soon as they broke up and she broke Cosima’s heart, he was all “Nope, that stupid bitch.” Or maybe it was offering her a place to live, rather than having her live in the apartment she once shared with Shay. Or maybe, it was everything all rolled into the joint she was smoking. Whatever it was, she was grateful and thankful.

 

Out of the corner of her eye, Cosima recognised a familiar face approaching them from Bobby’s bar. It was the new bartender that always seemed to have Cosima smirking, and grinning like a complete idiot. _But what is she coming over for_ , she thought to herself.

Felix instantly noticed the change of pace in Cosima’s presence. From serious “maybe she’s had one too many puff’s” to a casual, but silly smile. He turned around and put two and two together.

“Oi oi” he yelled to the blonde, waving her over.

He looked back at Cosima, giving her a knowing wink followed with a grin, “Well this should be fun.”


	4. Quatre

It was one of the very first truly breathtaking days Delphine had experienced since arriving in America. The sun was glistening, and radiating in every direction you turned to look. It seemed almost incomprehensible that she should have to work on this beautiful day.

As she walked the 2 blocks from where she hopped off the bus, to get to the bar, she noticed Felix and the girl with the strange and peculiar hair, standing in the alleyway from where the bar was and the block of apartments that’s connected to the bar. 

She was taken aback that the boy had flagged her over, but impressed nevertheless and was eager to actually meet some new people. She quickly hurried over, smiling at both the boy and the girl as she walked towards them. 

“Why hello there” the boy had said in his thick accent. She knew that accent from when she lived in France, having heard it more than you would think. It was definitely a London accent; very thick, and much drawled out. 

“Hallo” she waved and smiled nervously at the boy. 

“Do you mind if I join you for a cigarette?” she queried, but not wasting anytime by pulling a cigarette out from a packet in her bag. 

Felix, in the blink of an eye, pulled a lighter out from what appeared to be nowhere, “Not at all darling, besides it’s in our best interest to be chummy with our new bartender.” 

“Chummy?” Delphine asked, puzzled by this expression. 

“Friendly” Felix answered. “You’re French” he added, before extending his hand to meet the new girl. “Felix is the name.” 

Delphine greeted his hand with her own, “Delphine” she replied. “Enchantée.” 

Felix looked to the girl standing quietly to his right, “This is Cosima.” 

“Bonjour Cosima” Delphine greeted with a wave. 

The smaller girl waved back, and greeted her with a simple Hi, not before readjusting her glasses and sucking on her smoke. Both Felix and Cosima gave off the impression of artists, to Delphine. She wasn’t sure how to pin-point it, or what it was about both of them, but they had that creative vibe. 

It was a passion of Delphine’s from back home. She loved art, she loved everything about art. She loved the way the paintbrush stroked the canvas, or the way a pen left ink on a piece of paper. It wasn’t something Delphine pursued, but more of a hobby. She could tell, having met Felix and Cosima that they were the type of people she could hope to connect with. 

Before Delphine had left her home, she was a very quiet achiever. She kept to herself mostly, but was loved dearly by everyone she met or came to know. Her circle of friends were small, but big enough to matter for her. She had always wanted to pursue painting on a serious scale – how could you not when you live in Paris? But when her mother fell ill, and had to temporarily step down as CEO of her PR firm, Delphine stepped up and took over from her mother. 

Delphine was always set to take over from her mother, having interned and worked at the firm while also finishing off her studies. Although her parents encouraged her to do whatever it was she wanted to do, Delphine – in a way – did want the life her parents set up for her. She knew they worked hard to get where they were today, and she wanted to show them she could work just as hard and be everything they wanted her to be. 

It was three years before Delphine’s mother was fit enough to return to work, after recovering from breast cancer. Her mother wasn’t out of the woods, far from it, but she was healthy enough to return to work. They had always spoken about what Delphine’s role would be, if her mother returned, and she was happy to step down – but her mother didn’t want that. She wanted Delphine to continue on as CEO, especially because it showed that having trust and faith in her daughter to take on interim CEO, was proving to be the best thing for the company.

Delphine’s heart wasn’t in it though, and when her mother offered to step down permanently to allow Delphine to take over, she declined. It didn’t disappoint her mother (or her father), nor was she letting anyone down. In some way, her parents knew this life wasn’t for her – as much as she tried. There was something bigger out there for their daughter. They knew that, bust most importantly, Delphine was now starting to know that. 

“You’re not from around here are you?” Felix questioned, although with the French accent it wasn’t half obvious. 

Delphine laughed and nodded her head. “Paris” she chuckled. 

“How long have you been here for?” the smaller girl quietly quizzed, popping her head from behind Felix. 

“Two months.” 

“And do you live far from here?” Felix now questioned.

Delphine laughed again nodding her head to answer the boy, as she took another drag of her cigarette. 

“Sorry” Felix and Cosima both apologised in unison.  
  
“We swear we’re not trying to interrogate you or anything” Cosima insisted. 

The girl seemed friendly enough, a little timid at first, but there was something soothing about her presence. There was something familiar about this girl. Maybe they had met in another lifetime, nevertheless they both seemed friendly and eager to learn about her. 

“Non, it’s okay.” Delphine smiled, “I have to get to work though.” 

“Before you go,” Felix started, “We’re having a little get together tonight. If you wanted to join.” 

“I’d love to.” Delphine replied. 

“Good, because I wasn’t going to take no for an answer.” The boy had scribbled something down on a piece of paper and handed it over to Delphine. “That’s the code to let yourself in” He said, pointing to the block of apartments in front of where they were standing. 

Delphine looked at both Felix and Cosima, before taking this piece of paper and tucking it into the back pocket of her black tight jeans she was wearing. “Merci Felix” she started waving to both the boy and girl, “Au revoir Cosima.”


	5. Five

“Since when did we decide we were having a casual get together Felix?” Cosima yelled, slapping her friend of the arm. “Jeez man, now we’re going to have to work double time to get the loft in order!” 

“Calm down Cos, seriously” the boy rolled his eyes. “You’ll give yourself an ulcer.” 

“She must think we’re lunatics” Cosima worriedly said, “Possible nut-cases, maybe even murderers.” 

Felix took the joint out of Cosima’s hand, and took the last little bit of life it had left. He inhaled it in, held the smoke at the back of his throat for 7 seconds, and then exhaled. “Right, new game plan.”  
  
Cosima looked puzzled, everything that came out of Felix’s mouth always surprised her. But internally she was dreading the events that were about to take place. How could Felix just invite Delphine – _oh Delphine that was a lovely name_ – to their place this evening. A place that she had only just moved the last of her stuff into, and hadn’t even organized the contents of her belongings. The loft wasn’t going to clean and organize itself, and now it would have to happen in a few hours rather than a few days. 

“Oi Cos, you listening to anything I just said?” Felix asked, as the girl came out of her daze. “Wakey Wakey.” 

“Felix, what did we just do?” Cosima sighed. 

Felix laughed at the poor girl, who was standing before him in what he knew was a manic-and-nervous deflation. He hadn’t seen this side of Cosima in years, not since she first introduced Shay to him and Sarah. 

“Relax, will ya?” he pulled her close to him, giving her a tight squeeze on the shoulder. “It’s just drinks yeah?” 

Cosima agreed. What was she getting so worried about any way? This wasn’t her. She wasn’t that girl that got worried about socializing with people. She used to be so chilled out and relaxed; not a care in the world. But now she was turning into some type of postmenopausal pit fire of combustion. 

She rolled her eyes at her own inner musings; she was turning into something she knew she wasn’t. 

“You’re right.”  
  
“I always am.” He quipped without hesitation. “Well come on then, the loft isn’t going to clean itself.” 

She had met Shay three years ago, and they instantly had a connection. Felix and Sarah often asked why Cosima never dated anyone, which she always replied that it was never the right time for her. Science was what was important to Cosima, that and changing the world for the better. So, when she met Shay, it was beyond unexpected. When she fell in love with Shay, it was beyond her control. And when they ended their two-and-a-half year relationship, it was beyond a blow to the heart and the soul. 

It was a devastation she never knew existed, until that very moment. 

For the most part their relationship was intense. Cosima always felt, deep within, that it was probably too intense for what she was capable of handling. But the feelings, as overwhelming as they were, were too hard to control. She lost herself in love and lust, and everything else that comes with it. 

She became her own worst cliché fear, and they “U-hauled” after being together for only 6 months. Quickly snapping back at remarks, with it was the sensible option. They were always at each others houses, anyway, so why not move in? 

Cosima had sunk into the sofa, as she remembered the thoughts of her failed relationship. She opened a beer that Felix had not 5 minutes ago handed to her, and took a sip. After three and a half hours, and Sarah’s begrudging help, they had finally finished. 

“So, party?” Sarah asked, sitting back next to Cosima with a knowing grin. Felix had called her and told her the events that happened earlier, and as much as Sarah didn’t want to help Felix and Cosima, she also was keen to continue baiting the poor girl and ruffling her feathers. It was an endearing love she had for Cosima; almost sisterly. 

“Don’t you start” Cosima huffed, “It’s bad enough I acted like a total imbecile before, now I have to deal with your bitchy remarks?” 

“Whoa, someone needs to calm their tits.” Sarah bit back. “You know I’m just teasing yeah?” 

Cosima rolled her eyes. She did know Sarah was just teasing her, but it had been an extremely long day and she wasn’t in the mood for her friend’s weird ritual of giving her a hard time. She loved them, but sometimes she wanted to smack them over the head and tell them to shut up. 

They had met when they were teens. Sarah and Felix were the foster children of Mrs. S, who had moved over from London and lived across the road from Cosima and her parents. Her parents were always the _warm-welcomers_ to the neighbors, and when they found out they had new neighbors from England, they jumped at the chance to introduce themselves. 

Her parents had invited Mrs. S and her children over for dinner, one evening. A chance for the kids to get to know each other, they said. That night was a night Cosima would never forget. 

Cosima was always a very bright kid. She was clever, smart – too smart her parents always said. She was a genius child, but her parents worried that she would never have any friends. Having always felt out of place wherever she went. They could see her struggles. The other kids couldn’t relate to her, and she couldn’t relate to them. She only ever related to older people; people who were at the same intellectual level as she was. 

Her parents told her to show Sarah and Felix around the neighborhood, hoping to give the kids a chance to get to know each other. The start of the night was awkward small talk. Cosima didn’t really know what to say. They walked to the park, which was 10 minutes from where they lived. Cosima recognized a few kids from her class, and she rolled her eyes, telling Sarah and Felix that maybe they should get back for dinner. 

She can’t remember how or when it started, but the important parts she remembered. The kids from her class were yelling at her, nothing she hadn’t heard already, but out of nowhere Sarah had gone up to those kids, and held one of the boys by his shirt and told him if he ever caught her saying shit to Cosima again, that he and his friends would have to deal with her and her fists. 

They’d been best friends ever since. 

Sarah had a funny way of showing her love for Cosima, but she knew it was there. She had known it was there since that day she first met her. Sarah and Felix were her first real friends. They didn’t care she was a child prodigy; they didn’t care she was super smart; they didn’t care that her brain sometimes went too fast and neither of them could keep up with her moving, flapping arms as she spoke a million miles an hour. 

“I know Sarah.” She chimed in, finally.  
  
“Someone’s on edge” Felix piped up, as he moved in between Sarah and Cosima on the sofa. “You know, Cos, for someone who’s smart, you sure are dumb.” 

Sarah laughed uncontrollably at what her brother had just said, not before seeing Cosima’s unimpressed features – darting both of them with “don’t fuck me with right now” eyes. “Oi leave her alone.” 

“I can’t deal with you two right now.” 

“Hey chill.” Felix protested, although softly spoken. He knew he probably overstepped the mark with his last comment, but his friend really did need to loosen up a bit.  

“Right, we need more people here.” Sarah said, trying to change the topic. After all, if they were going to have a party – they may as well go all out.  
  
“I’ll go get the beers.” Felix proposed. “What do you feel like Cos?” 

“Whisky.” It was the one vice that would never fail her, that and weed.


	6. Six

It was quarter to eight and Delphine’s shift was almost coming to an end. She had told Bobby earlier in the day that she was off upstairs to Felix’s for a few drinks at the end of her shift, and wanted her to come. Then she started asking Bobby all sorts of questions about Felix, and about Cosima. Although Bobby only knew bits and pieces, she reassured Delphine they were good people. A little wild, but good, decent people. 

“I’ll see you up there?” Delphine asked, as she put on her leather jacket. 

Bobby nodded, and slid across a bottle of wine. “Take this, can’t have you going empty handed.” 

“Merci” Delphine smiled. 

As she slowly walked up the four flights of stairs, cursing and mumbling silently to herself, making quick mental notes about giving up smoking again, she finally came to Felix and Cosima’s loft. She could hear the loud music being played on the inside of where she was currently standing, and suddenly had hesitations of knocking on the door. 

It was hard being new, but being new to a new city, in a new country, was terrifying. Delphine was an accomplished person in her own right, but that was back home. No one knew her here. She knew no one here, except for Alison. But even then, she hardly saw Alison because of their opposing schedules. Delphine truly felt alone in this moment, and hesitated. 

“Oh hey you came” the familiar voice snapped Delphine out of her current hesitations and worries. 

“Sorry yes” Delphine said, handing the bottle of wine to Cosima. “For you” she added. 

“Oh thanks.” Cosima moved to the side to allow Delphine to enter, “Let me take your jacket.” 

Delphine removed her jacket to give to Cosima, watching her hang it on the coat stand they were standing left of. She studied her surroundings carefully, observing the numerous people here. She caught Felix by what looked to be the kitchen, deep in conversation with a girl she had seen him and Cosima with before at the bar. 

The room was completely eclectic. Artwork scattered all over, almost replicating an old grungy alleyway of graffiti that Paris was so common with. She loved it. She loved the essence and creativity of her surroundings; the eclecticism and eroticism she found herself amongst. 

“Want the grand tour?” Cosima asked. 

“Oui” Delphine replied, before mentally slapping herself. “I mean yes” she corrected. 

Cosima laughed as she grabbed Delphine by the arm, “You don’t have to correct yourself” she added. 

It was a big space, but it was also a small space Delphine noted as Cosima pointed out every aspect of the loft. Everything was open, except for the bathroom and the bedrooms. 

“Who is the artist?” Delphine asked, reaching down to look through all the canvases that were piled on top of each other. 

“Felix is” Cosima answered. 

_Très talentueux_ she murmured to herself, still perusing the artwork before her. 

“Can I get you a drink Delphine?” Cosima offered. 

Delphine nodded, and followed the smaller girl.  
  
“And what do you do Cosima?” 

“I studying Evolutionary Development” Cosima nonchalantly stated, pouring herself and Delphine both a glass of the wine Delphine brought from downstairs. 

“Ooh” the taller blonde gushed. “A scientist.” 

“One day” Cosima chuckled, handing one of the glasses of wine over to Delphine. 

Cosima led them both to the middle of the room, where Felix was now sitting on one of the sofas. There were about 20 or 30 people all spread around the loft. Some dancing to the music, some sitting wherever they could all deep in conversation. She recognised a few faces she had seen in the bar before, but didn’t know anyone’s name. 

“Delphine” Felix greeted, standing to meet the blonde. 

Delphine leant over towards Felix’s cheek and greeted him with a cheek-kiss, softly touching his left cheek with hers, and leaning back around to softly touch his right cheek with her own. A customary French cheek kiss greeting.

“This is Sarah.” Felix introduced Delphine to the girl sitting on the sofa. She had an intimidating look about her, Delphine noted. It was a look that this girl clearly wanted you to know she wasn’t to be taken for a fool. People like that, someone who puts on a mask to hide their fragility, always intrigued Delphine. She liked to see through people; she liked to see their truth. 

“Hi” Delphine waved. 

“So you’re from France?” Sarah rhetorically asked, more matter-of-fact statement. 

“Paris” Delphine stated. “I moved here two months ago with a friend.” 

“A friend?” Sarah inquired more 

“Oui….yes. She goes to the University of Minnesota.” 

“Oh yeah?” Cosima piped up. “What’s her name? Not that I’d know her, because there’s like tens of thousands of people there.”  
  
“Alison” Delphine said. “Hendrix.” 

Cosima shook her head, not recognizing the name. 

“So what brings you out here?” Sarah interjected, still wanting to know more about the girl. 

“Stop interrogating her” Cosima slapped Sarah’s arm. “Felix and I already interrogated her enough today.” 

“No no, it’s okay” Delphine reassured Cosima with a gentle smile, turning to face Sarah again. “Honestly, I can’t explain it. Have you ever just had a feeling that you were meant for something else?” 

Delphine could see that Sarah was taken aback by her question, possibly searching for the answer or maybe just thinking that Delphine was foolish. 

“Haven’t really given it much thought” Sarah admitted. “But my foster mum came over here with Felix and me, because she thought she had a purpose here.” 

“Christ, enough with the D&M shite and let’s get shit-faced drunk” Felix complained in his ever so flamboyant way. 

A couple of hours had flown by, Bobby had come and gone, and Delphine felt herself more comfortable in her surroundings. Cosima has apologized several times for all the interrogations, but the truth was Delphine didn’t mind – she quite liked that people wanted to get to know her, and she wanted to get to know these people. 

She found herself striking up conversations with some regular faces she had seen in the bar below, and it was a common theme that most of these people were artists in some form or another. Jill was a single mother and an erotic dancer two blocks away, but she was also in one of Cosima’s classes. Then there was Teddy, who resembled a teddy bear, one of Felix’s many casual flings. Teddy was a bank accountant by day, and a poet by night - often seen at Slam Poetry events around Minnesota. With every conversation she had, Delphine was always sure to check in with Cosima – even if it was a simple acknowledging nod from opposite sides of the loft. 

As midnight approached, the party was slowly dwindling down and Delphine soon realized that she needed to leave shortly to catch one of the last buses back home. She scanned he room to see where Cosima was, not wanting to leave without saying goodbye, but couldn’t see her anywhere. 

“Missing something?” Felix asked, approaching Delphine.  
  
“I have to go” Delphine replied. “But I don’t want to leave without saying goodbye to Cosima.”

Felix linked his arm into Delphine’s. “Grab your jacket.” 

Delphine followed Felix down the four flights of stairs, and into the coolness of a cold Minnesota night. 

“Oi oi” Felix yelled towards where Delphine had initially seen both he and Cosima earlier that day.  
  
“Oh hey, you leaving?” Cosima asked 

“Oui. I must, before my last bus.” 

Delphine bent down towards Cosima’s left cheek, gently brushing it with her own and softly kissing the air beside it. She brought her head around to the girls’ right cheek and mimicking her previous actions. “Thank you for inviting me.” 

And with that, Delphine turned around and walked off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies if this seems slow. Will try to pick up the pace a wee bit! Thanks for sticking with it.


	7. Seven

Her heart was pounding hard and fast; the warmth invading her neck. _Thump, thump, thump…_ was quite literally all she could hear from her chest, as Delphine’s warm breath caught her skin. She saw the way Delphine kissed Felix earlier, the same way she was kissing her now; cheek to cheek. 

She hadn’t heard a word Delphine said, or noticed that she had now walked away; still too caught up in the experience she was feeling. _Thump, thump, thump…_ any moment now she thought she was going to have a heart attack. 

It wasn’t until Felix clicked his fingers in front of her eyes that Cosima came back to reality. Delphine had gone, Felix quickly briefed Cosima. Not forgetting to add the quick black-out she apparently just had, shaking his head at his friend who was clearly smitten by the French. 

Cosima finally processed the events, and realized she couldn’t let Delphine walk alone, let alone catch transport this late at night. After telling Felix she would be back soon, Cosima decided to go after Delphine hoping that she wouldn’t miss the other woman. 

She picked up the pace, with a gentle jog. Running wasn’t Cosima’s forte, nor was jogging – she disliked any form of physical activity really. As she came closer to the bus stop, she saw that Delphine was still standing there. Smiling to herself, and slowing down the pace to catch her breath, she took in the beauty before her. There was something about this woman; the way she stood, the way she spoke, the way she smiled. Cosima was definitely smitten, but there was something more but she didn’t know what. 

“Hey Delphine” she softly spoke as not to startle the blonde. 

“Cosima” Delphine turned around, a little shocked to see the smaller woman there. “What are you doing here?” 

“It’s late…” she started, “I didn’t want you to be on your own this late.” 

Delphine smiled. There was a warmth about her smile, there was also a light about it too. It lit up a whole room, having already been captivated by it earlier. There were moments back at the loft, where Cosima had looked up from whoever she was talking to, only half-heartedly engaged in the conversation that was being had, to see Delphine’s smile – watching her speak to her friends. 

“You’re very kind Cosima, but I can look after myself.” 

“I have no doubt” Cosima quickly responded, “But, it would make me feel better if you came back with me to the loft and I can drive you home tomorrow.” 

They walked in silence back to the loft. It should have only taken them 10 or so minutes, but it felt like time was moving slowly. Both of them taking in the moment of the night, and the silence. The moon shining brightly, the stars glowing brightly, and everything around them was still. 

As they got back to the loft, Cosima had told Delphine she was quickly going to have a smoke before she went back up there, which Delphine was more than happy to also have one. 

“Do you mind if I have some?” Delphine asked, her eyes directly upon the lit joint in between Cosima’s lips. 

“You know this is pot right?” 

“I’m French” Delphine started, “Not silly” she teased. 

Cosima took another puff of her joint before passing it over to the blonde. She watched intently at how Delphine sucked on the smoke, and breathed it in. She smoked the joint like a cigarette, sitting it between her index and middle finger. She treated it like a cigarette, but at the same time it was obvious this wasn’t the first joint Delphine ever smoked. It all seemed sensual; seductive even. There was an excitement about sharing her joint with this woman, it made her feel like she was 16 again and the first time she ever had pot. 

They finished off smoking, and Cosima led Delphine upstairs to her apartment. As they entered, it was quiet and the people that previously filled this room had already left. Felix was nowhere in sight either, but there was a note left on the kitchen table: 

_Cos,_

_Gone to Sarah’s to continue on_

_Love ya guts_

_F x_

 

“Drink?” Cosima asked Delphine as she was picking up random empty bottles from each and every direction. “We have tea….all sorts of tea…..there’s water….or whisky.” 

“I won’t say no to a whisky” Delphine casually remarked, following Cosima. 

“Now we’re talking” Cosima laughed. 

They sat in silence some more, but it seemed comfortable and natural. Cosima didn’t want Delphine to feel like she always had to answer her questions, even though there were plenty more questions she wanted to ask. Cosima noted that the only way to drink whisky was neat, to which Delphine concurred adding that _it was the only way to appreciate the taste_. 

Cosima couldn’t help but watch Delphine take in her surroundings. Her eyes went back and forth between different paintings. She liked the way that this girl seemed to really be taken with Felix’s creations, and if Felix knew – well, he’d be over the moon. 

“You can take my bed” Cosima said softly, leaning forward to put her now empty glass on the table in front. “I’ll sleep in Felix’s.” 

Delphine nodded as she also put her empty glass on the table. 

Cosima led Delphine to her room, silently thanking her friends for making sure it was still clean and presentable enough for company – although fast realising that it was only earlier on that day that she had re-assembled everything and wasn’t sure if it was done properly. Which made her chuckle to herself a little, thinking of all of the possible scenarios. _Maybe Delphine should take Felix’s bed_ although that thought was more frightening, _God knows what’s in Felix’s room_. 

She left the French woman in her room, as she walked back to Felix’s room and made herself comfortable on his bed. There were clothes everywhere, and she wasn’t sure what was clean and what wasn’t. There were all sorts of drugs just casually lying about, which Cosima rolled her eyes at. There were sex toys on the ground, and empty beer bottles. Her head came crashing to the pillow, and she suddenly realized just how exhausted she really was. It had been a long day. A really long day. But as much as her body was exhausted, her mind was still wide awake with thoughts of Delphine. 

Cosima was extremely attracted to her, but that attraction grew strong over the past couple of hours having spoken with her, engaged by her conversation and her presence. She wanted to pin-point what or where the attraction was coming from – yes, Delphine was beautiful, but it wasn’t that. There was a gentleness about her; a calming influence that had captivated not only her attention but her body. 

Twenty minutes had passed, and Cosima still couldn’t shut her mind off. Tossing and turning around Felix’s bed, and it didn’t help that she was worried his sheets hadn’t been changed ever. She decided to get up and pour herself a glass of water, and distract herself until she felt sleepy again. 

She plonked herself back down on the sofa with a tall glass of water in hand, taking slow sips from the glass. Her mind still on Delphine, and every time she said her name her heart grew faster and louder. 

“Hey” 

“Oh shit!” Cosima yelped, surprised by the woman now standing above her. 

“Sorry” Delphine apologised. “Didn’t mean to scare you.” 

“No no, that’s okay” Cosima reassured. “Can’t sleep?” 

Delphine shrugged, now sitting herself down beside Cosima. “A little too high I think.” 

Cosima grinned. “Yep, good shit.” 

Both Cosima and Delphine sunk into the sofa, heads laying back and looking up at the ceiling. No wall was without a slice of Felix’s art, and Cosima had often found this to be one of her happy places. She could just be still, and silent, and look up and be enchanted by art – but not any art; her best friend’s art. 

“He’s very talented.” Delphine noted. 

Cosima nodded, no words leaving her mouth. She didn’t feel like she needed to say anything, but just appreciate the moment. 

She sighed heavily. A good sigh. A sigh of being content; at peace. Closing her eyes to her surroundings, Cosima was falling asleep. 

“Cosima?” Delphine whispered. 

She squinted at the woman besides her, only half opening her eyes. “Mm?” 

“Let me take you to bed.” 

Cosima had no energy to protest, even though she wanted to. She was enjoying this moment, but mostly she was enjoying being next to Delphine. It wasn’t until a few moments later that Cosima realized Delphine had led her to her own bed, and not Felix’s. Delphine pulled up the sheets and tucked Cosima in, smiling down at her. 

“Are you coming in?” Cosima asked. 

“Oui” the French woman replied, walking around to the other side of Cosima’s bed, and tucking herself under the sheets. 

“Delphine?”

“Yes Cosima?” 

Cosima hesitated for a second, still half-asleep but conscious enough to know her surroundings “I have to tell you something.” 

“Okay…” 

“I’m gay.” 

Delphine paused for a moment, “…I know.” 

Cosima was puzzled by this response, how did she know? Was she that obvious? “Oh.” 

Delphine chuckled slightly, also growing tired. “Your sexuality isn’t the most interesting thing about you Cosima.” She rested her hand on Cosima’s back, giving her a reassuring tug. “Being a scientist, though…now that’s impressive!” Delphine half joked, but there was also a genuine tone about the way she said it. 

She felt a sense of pride and accomplishment that this girl, she hardly knew, was impressed that she was a budding scientist. Next thing she knew, she fell into a deep sleep.


	8. Huit

Delphine had woken up several times throughout the night, often pondering why Cosima had felt it necessary to tell her she was gay. It didn’t matter to her, and it shouldn’t be something anyone felt the need to announce. Her parents had opened her eyes to sex, and sexuality at a young age. Delphine’s uncle (her father’s brother) was gay, and he was the most fabulous, and enriching person she had ever known – closely next to her parents. Sexuality was never an issue in her family, or in her life. 

Her uncle Claude had always treated Delphine like she was his own daughter. When her father had a breakdown, after he received the news that her mother was ill, it was her uncle Claude that always reassured Delphine that everything would be alright. He had that charm about him, always making you feel like you could do anything, be anyone, and that everything (even if it wasn’t) would be alright. 

Maybe Cosima didn’t have a family upbringing like her own. Maybe it was an issue in Cosima’s life? She thought. Or maybe she was trying to be polite. After all, she barely knew this woman, and this woman barely knew her. 

She looked at the woman next to her, her dreadlocks messily tucked into a bun. She was rolled onto her side, facing away from Delphine, leaving her back exposed. Cosima was still dressed in a black singlet top, with the thinnest of straps, and a black bra underneath. 

Delphine rubbed her temples, hoping to finally fall back to sleep, but it didn’t seem like it was going to happen any time soon. She began to marvel at the woman next to her; her back, her skin, which led her to start thinking about her boyfriend back home – Olivier. He was a passionate lover, and very attentive to Delphine’s wants and needs. She loved him, but wasn’t in love with him. 

Being in love was a term Delphine thought was used in all the wrong contexts. _Too many people want to be in love, rather than fall in love._ Delphine was in love with every moment the sun shone down, and glistened everything around her. She was in love with people and their passion for even the mind-numbingly simplest of things; as long as they were passionate about it. Being in love with a single person, because you thought that’s what came next in a relationship, wasn’t actually being in love to Delphine – being in love, was being in love with everything and anything and all the things. 

There were times where explaining this theory to people had left them dumbfounded. It was as though you were only ever allowed to be in love with one thing; one person – the person you wanted to marry. It all seemed naïve to Delphine, but she let it be. She solely believed in truth, and everyone’s right to have a truth. 

The blonde scooted closer to Cosima, trying not to move too much as to wake the sleeping girl next to her, but she wanted to capture this moment and hold it tightly. There was something different about a person who is awake as to when they are asleep. She noticed that Cosima was always switched on and alert, but now she was switched off. Cosima looked vulnerable, she looked peaceful, and she looked beautiful. 

Delphine lazily started to stroke Cosima’s back, taking in the smoothness and coolness of her skin. She had wondered if the girl was cold, and maybe she should pull the blankets up further. Instead, she continued stroking her back, this time making patterns with her fingers on her back. First there were star shapes, then diamonds – she even wrote her name. Delphine slid further down the bed, to be at the same level as Cosima, moving herself even closer to her. The closer she moved, the warmer she felt. Her eyes were in direct contact with Cosima’ back, from where the skin was exposed to the cut-off point on the middle of her back where her clothes started. She focused strongly, observing every minute detail. Before she realized what she was doing, her lips were close to her back. With one sporadic move, she was placing soft, gentle kisses, on Cosima’s back. 

Her breasts were firmly pressed against the other woman, as her kisses moved further up her back almost reaching Cosima’s neck. Delphine paused knowing that she shouldn’t be doing this, but she also didn’t want to stop. There was a beauty about the woman that she hadn’t seen in another person before. Cosima was beautiful, she was fragile, and she was strong, intelligent, and sexy. She was all the things. She wanted, for some unexplainable reason, to feel close with this woman. It was like much of her life; unexplainable urges. 

Delphine kissed the back of Cosima’s neck. Maybe it was the alcohol, or the weed, but Delphine had felt this rush come over her. She wanted to wake Cosima – she wanted Cosima to be awake so she could continue kissing her; kissing the woman with the strange and peculiar hair. She wanted to know what it was like to kiss Cosima, and be kissed by her. To be touched by her, as she was softly touching her now. 

She didn’t wake though, and Delphine knew she had to stop. She removed herself from Cosima’s body, and rolled to the other side of the bed. 

“Merde” she hummed.


	9. Nine

“Why did you stop?” Cosima asked as she rolled over to now face Delphine. She could see the sudden flush of redness wipe over Delphine’s face, as she came to realize Cosima had been awake. 

“Je suis dèsolée, Pardonne-moi, je t'en prie” 

Delphine realized that she had spoken French, rather than English. It wasn’t on purpose, more of a force of habit. Especially in an awkward and embarrassing situation that she currently found herself in. 

“I’m so sorry Cosima. Forgive me, please” She corrected herself. 

There wasn’t anything to forgive. Cosima had quite enjoyed waking up to the soft kisses that were being gently placed on her back by the woman next to her. At first she thought she was still dreaming, but it wasn’t until Delphine’s lips met her neck, that she soon realized she was very much awake. It took every ounce of energy she had not to jump as soon as her neck was kissed. 

“Delphine, there’s no reason to be sorry” she quietly whimpered, although becoming more conscious to the notion that perhaps Delphine didn’t mean to kiss her. _But she did_ , she reassured herself. 

“I do not know what came over me Cosima.”  
  
The way she pronounced her name seemed to roll freely off the tongue. It was almost alluring, and rather sexual all in the same space. 

Cosima had now rolled onto her back, giving the woman next to her some space. She laid there pondering, and wondering, and thinking, and over-analysing, until her mind couldn’t take it anymore. She let out a sigh – or a grunt, she couldn’t quite separate the two noises at this time of night, still half asleep. 

“I’ve wanted to be touched by you ever since I first saw you at the bar” she finally let out. She hadn’t meant to be so forward, or so abrupt, but she also felt that honesty was the best policy. Especially when it was 2 in the morning, and little sleep had been had. 

This vow of honesty caused Delphine to flinch. She couldn’t see her, choosing not to look at her as she confessed her truth, but she could feel the woman next to her tighten up as she spoke. 

Before Cosima met Shay, there were never really any girlfriends in her life. There were casual lovers to keep her warm at night, but she never felt that thing – that buzz – for another person before. And then Shay came, and within seconds of meeting her, she was practically banging her in the loo at the club they were at. There was an instant physical attraction, that turned into lust, and then into love. 

After moving in together, things quickly went downhill. Both knew it was too soon, but neither of them wanted to admit their foolish naïve mistake. So they tried, and tried, and tried to make it work until they just didn’t care anymore. 

That’s not entirely true, Cosima cared. And she thinks Shay did too, otherwise why else did they invest so much of themselves into something they were inevitably unhappy with? One night, Cosima came home earlier than expected, and as she walked into the door she immediately knew something was wrong. Everything seemed wrong. Everything looked wrong. Two seconds later she heard giggling in her shower, and as she opened the door she saw Shay naked, with another naked woman, in their shower. In _her_ shower. 

Cosima hadn’t cried so much in all of her life. Those tears turned into anger. That anger turned into a whole lot of drunken one-night stands, drugs, and alcohol. Which then turned into being at a loss. Felix liked to say _That stupid bitch never deserved you anyway Cosima,_ and yet three weeks before those words left his mouth, and before Shay had cheated on Cosima, they were all dancing around that very apartment. 

She was left heartbroken, but at the same time she was relieved. The relationship was finally over, and Cosima could get a clean break from the unhappiness she found herself in. As much as it hurt her soul, and her heart, she knew deep down it was the best for everyone. It was the best thing for her. 

“Cosima, I…” Delphine paused, trying to think of the words to say. English had been her second language, so she wasn’t unfamiliar with it, but everything seemed too black, grey, blue, and seven shades of green with English, unlike French – where it was all natural and simple. “…I…I have a boyfriend back in Paris.” The last of those words were more of a whisper of shame, then an admission of any sort. 

“I see.” There were no other words she could think to say. Of course she wanted to ask all sorts of questions about him, and now about her, and why was she kissing her back? _Maybe that’s a French thing to do_ , she boiled it down to. 

Cosima rolled back over to her original position, facing away from Delphine. It was all too much for her to comprehend and emotionally deal with at this time of day, night, morning – whatever it was. “We should get some sleep.” 

“Non, Cosima” Delphine pleaded, “Let me explain…please.” 

The brunette didn’t want to be rude, but it really wasn’t the right time to talk about whatever was going on. All she wanted to do, now, was sleep. Instead, she rolled back around to Delphine and looked at her with an indication to go on. 

“I kissed your back because…” she looked into Cosima’s eyes, a gentle hint of softness that caused a stir in Cosima’s chest, “because I’ve found myself very attractive to you.” 

Cosima let out a laugh, “Did you say attractive?” 

“Oui, yes” Delphine puzzled by the question. 

“You’re cute” 

Delphine soon realized her mistake, and blushed, “You’re making fun of me, non?” 

“A little…yeah.” 

“You’re a brat, Cosima.” Both laughed in unison. 

A yawn had left Cosima’s mouth, which also caused Delphine to yawn. As much as Cosima wanted to let sleep consume her, once more, she was also enjoying the playful banter between her and the French woman who lay next to her. 

“Why did you feel it…” Delphine paused trying to think of the correct word, “Necessary I think is the word? You know… to tell me you are gay?” 

The question surprised Cosima. It almost seemed out of nowhere, but then it dawned upon her that she must have haphazardly said it before she fell asleep. 

“I wanted to be up front with you” she admitted, “In case you had an issue with…it.” 

“I don’t” Delphine reassured. “But I couldn’t stop thinking about it, and then I found myself…well, you know.” She blushed, remembering all too well of the way she kissed Cosima’s back, and her neck. 

“Delphine?” 

“Oui?” 

“Kiss me.” It wasn't a question.


	10. Dix

A quick blush had suffused her face, as those words echoed in the bedroom. Hearing Cosima demand that she kiss her was all the invitation needed. Her eyes were bright and tender with a smile, as she glanced into the woman who pleaded to be kissed. 

Met with tenderness, and begging eyes, Delphine had asked Cosima to sit up, and somehow their legs had intertwined across each other, facing each other. She didn’t want to kiss her laying down, it felt too much like she was going to domineer the woman. She wanted to be on an equal level with her, she wanted to be kissed back with the same amount of intensity as she felt she was going to kiss Cosima with. 

There was a warmth in her eyes that enamoured Delphine. A devotion in her smile every time she engaged with people, and interacted with people. Cosima was confident and timid; brave and fragile. To Delphine, she was everything that a person should be – light and shade. Cosima intrigued her, at they had only officially met yesterday morning, but she saw it briefly every time Cosima came into the bar. There was definite lightness about her; lightness and love. 

Delphine was enamoured by her; a girl she knew nothing about, and yet seemed to know everything – or, at least, feel everything. She was a mystery that Delphine wanted to solve. 

The blonde had moved in closer to Cosima, holding eye contact with her. It was gentle, but conceived of so much desire and of want. She brought her left hand up to Cosima’s cheek, feeling the warm skin with her palm; gently tracing her jawline with the tips of her finger. Cosima’s eyes had closed, and a small smile crept out, as she inadvertently leaned into Delphine’s touch. 

Her right hand was now gently placed on Cosima’s right cheek; her hands now grasping this woman’s face – holding her. Delphine felt her heart pounding through her veins, and there was a nervousness in the air, but she had never felt so sure that this was all so very right. 

Those pleading, almost begging eyes, were again in Delphine’s plain sight. Cosima looked almost sad, yet elated; vulnerable yet sanguine. The sudden and unexpected urge to feel the brunette, was too much for Delphine to handle, as she leaned forward into the woman before her, and paused just before her lips could meet Cosima’s. 

The smaller woman’s eyes had closed, which was all the permission Delphine needed. Their lips finally met, and a bolt of electricity had rushed through her entire body. It was as though a cataclysmic seizure had gone off in her body; a rush of adrenaline palpitating at her entire being. The kiss, itself, was soft and full of tenderness, but there was a passion about it which words could not describe. She opened her mouth, just enough for their tongues to interlock and dance. 

Delphine had never kissed a woman before, but it was so much more inviting, and definitely softer than kissing any man. It was physically different, for sure, but emotionally different as well. She didn’t quite anticipate the emotional side of kissing a woman. It took her breath away. 

She didn’t mean to compare the kiss she was suddenly experiencing with Cosima, to that of her boyfriend, but with Cosima she was gentle – and he was not. Kissing Olivier, was rough, and maybe that was because of his facial hair, or stubble at best. But it was rough, it felt rough. Cosima felt soft, and warm, and inviting. Olivier did not. Her lips met in harmony with Cosima’s, but it always felt opposing with Olivier. It wasn’t sloppy, or rushed, or forced; and it tasted different. 

There was a bond that felt like it was being created as their tongues continued dancing, and their lips interlocked more and more. There was an emotional connection being formed with this woman, without feeling like this was going to turn into sex. Something that Delphine always felt the opposite when it came to the men in her life. 

With Cosima it felt as though she could kiss her for hours and that would be suffice; that there was no demand for anything more other than this emotional connection that was being formed: this bond. It was intimate, it was sensual, and it was causing a stir in all of the right places. Her body was on fire, and her mouth craved more of Cosima’s. 

“I need to breathe” Cosima mumbled into Delphine’s mouth 

Delphine chuckled, of course, but was thankful for the opening to breathe herself. The intensity, and need of wanting more of Cosima’s mouth on hers, causing a great deal of rush of blood to the head. 

Their legs still wrapped around each other, growing closer when they kissed, they paused and took each other in. Both women fueled only on adrenaline; bodies growing tired but awake as well. Delphine cupped Cosima’s face again, as she leaned in to kiss her forehead. 

“We should sleep” Delphine whispered, as she placed a gentle kiss on Cosima’s cheek. 

Cosima smiled and nodded; the look of appreciation hadn’t gone unnoticed. With one swift move, both their bodies had found position lying next to one another again. 

“Can I hold you?” Cosima asked softly. 

Delphine hadn’t heard those words in a long time, not even after having sex with her boyfriend. Not that she wanted to be held, or in close proximity afterwards anyway. She didn’t know what it was, and she had always felt strange about it, but it was the last thing she wanted after sex with him. Rolling over and falling asleep was always the preferred option, but having Cosima ask her if she could hold her, she wanted that very much. She wanted to feel close, and warm, and in someone’s arms. 

“Oui” she finally replied. “I would very much like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank-you to your comments and kudos. I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it. I'm a big ol' kitten I think. I'd truly love to hear your thoughts on this chapter, or the story for that matter. It's been about 8 years since I last wrote any form of fan-fiction, and I feel way out of my depth. Anyway, enjoy - and thank you again. :)


	11. Eleven

“Oh blimey Cos, it’s been two weeks.” Felix was walking around the loft like a mad man, demanding answers (or something) from Cosima, and trying to ‘sort her out’ as he put it. “I can’t take this pouty sulky Cosima anymore” he finally declared. 

“I’m not sulking Felix.” Cosima responded bitterly. She hadn’t technically been sulking, or pouting for that matter, but she was trying to process the events that happened two weeks earlier. 

His eyes grew wide. “You? Not being sulky? Bloody heck” he scoffed. “Right, and I’m Captain Jack flamin’ Sparrow.” 

“Oi you two…would ya pipe down already” Sarah demanded, popping her head up from the book she had been staring at for the past two hours. “Some of us don’t really give a shit around ‘ere.” 

“What’s up your bum hole?” Felix asked, as his attention darted towards Sarah. 

Sarah slowly, but filled with purpose, put her book down on the table in front of her. She calmly stared back up at her brother, “Felix, you give shit advice. And Cos…” her eyes now on the dread-locked woman, “If I hear one more “but” from you, I will throw you off the balcony.” 

Cosima and Felix both looked at each other protesting the harsh words being thrown at them. 

“I don’t want to hear about it anymore. And I sure as shit don’t give two shits about any of it anymore” Sarah stood up from where she was sitting, grabbing her book off the table. “If you’re not bloody gonna go down there and ask bloody Delphine out, like I told you to two weeks ago, then that’s your decision Cosima, but leave me the hell out of it now.” 

She walked past both Felix and Cosima, who were standing there stunned. “I’ll be downstairs reading my book with an ale, if you two decide to get the sticks out of your arses and stop it with the woe is me bullshit.” The door slammed on her way out. 

“Well…” Felix dramatically flicked his hair, “You got told.” 

Cosima rolled her eyes at the boy. “Have I really been that bad?” She finally asked, although now not wanting to really know. 

Felix put his arm around the girl, “Yes. You really have.” He laughed, almost mocking in a sense. “But, I get it. And as much as Sarah went all rage blackout then, she gets it too” he reassured. 

Cosima had woken up alone in her bed, _that_ morning, and memories of the night (and morning) had slowly came flooding back. She put her glasses on, looking around her bedroom; trying to refocus and wake up. 

She got out of bed and called out Delphine’s name, met only with silence. A few moments later, she saw a note on her table – next to Felix’s note from the night before: 

_Thanks for last night_

_Delphine_

 

“Thanks for last night? What’s that supposed to me?” She asked the empty loft.

A couple of hours later, Felix returned home with Sarah. She knew she was going to be met with jokes and being laughed at, and she was right. After she told them everything that happened, there were _oohs_ and _aahs_ , and also kissy faces and songs about kissing in the tree. It made her visibly blush, which was all the momentum both Felix and Sarah needed. 

Like always, though, it died down. They both saw her in deep contemplation, with Felix even suggesting he’d go down there and ‘kick the door in’ for some answers – _oh Felix_. But Sarah – she was more to the point. 

“You like her.” She said. It was obvious, and Cosima merely scraped out a nod at the question, or statement as it were. 

“Then do something about is Cos.” There was a long pause between both girls, with Sarah searching Cosima’s eyes. She saw the vulnerability. Cosima was always honest with her eyes; there wasn’t a story you couldn’t tell from looking into her eyes. 

“I’m not ready.” She finally admitted. 

Cosima hadn’t gone downstairs to the bar in the two weeks since she last saw Delphine, but Felix had been down there and attempted to keep Cosima informed of how hot her ‘lady beau’ looked. The thought of going down there now, after Sarah, sent her stomach into a spin. _What if she was there? What if she purposely tries to avoid me? What if, what if, what if._ _  
_

It was as if Felix had read her mind, with the way he was comforting Cosima with his arm around her growing tighter. “Oi come on yeah? We can do this.” 

_We_ , she thought. Yeah, that’s right – _we_. There was no _I_ or _You_ with Felix. Your problems were _his_ problems, and everything you went through – _he went through_. He was truly her best friend; both he and Sarah, and she knew with Felix by her side, she could do anything. 

They both walked into Bobby’s bar, and saw Sarah t their usual booth. Cosima peered around the half-empty bar, and there was no Delphine in sight. _She mustn’t be working today_ , she thought. It gave her a sense of relief, and even calmed down her initial nerves. Felix went up to the bar to order their drinks, and Cosima sat herself opposite Sarah. 

“Sorry I snapped” Sarah said as she kept her eyes focused on her book, rather than meet Cosima’s eyes. 

“Sorry I bored you with my melodramatic…” she paused, not really quite knowing how to finish that statement, “thing.” 

Sarah scoffed and put her book down. “Thing?” 

Cosima shrugged, “I got nothing.” Cosima looked to see where Felix was, who was chatting to Bobby up at the bar. Her eyes met Sarah’s again, who seemed enthralled in the book she was reading. “What are you reading anyway?” 

“I love Dick.” 

“You what now?” Cosima laughed a laugh right from the belly. It was the most unexpected thing to have been said. “Felix?” Cosima yelled across the room as the boy was now approaching them. “Sarah loves dick.” 

“Don’t we all?” Felix replied suggestively. 

Sarah rolled her eyes at the mockery at her expense, that was now taking place, “It’s by Chris Kraus, you immature little git.” 

Cosima threw her hands up in the air, protesting at the name-calling. “Funniest thing I’ve heard all week” she said between bouts of laughter.

They all stayed at the bar for another hour, finishing their drinks and continuing to laugh at Sarah’s expense. The atmosphere in the room was buzzing, and Cosima found herself completely relax and actually enjoying herself. She had let the last two weeks get her down, with too many unanswered questions that she stewed on rather than either ask Delphine about, or simply let them go. So, she made the executive decision to simply let it be. What happened was nice and enjoyable, but Cosima wasn’t going to continue down the spiral of destructiveness by pondering or wondering. It happened. There wasn’t anything more she could do about it, and now she was going to move forward. 

“I like seeing you laugh Cos” Felix stated, as their bantering came to a halt. Sarah had gone to the bathroom, and was going to get them their last round of beers. 

“I like laughing” Cosima added. “It’s nice.” 

Felix picked up Sarah’s book from the table, “I like Dick hey? Sounds like a book for me.” 

Both erupted into another bout of laughter, which had abruptly ended as soon as Cosima saw Delphine approaching their table  walking with Sarah. “Oh boy.” 

Felix turned around to see what had made Cosima go quietly all of a sudden. “Delphine.” He greeted. 

“Bonjour Felix” The blonde replied. Her hair was messily up in a bun, with her curls still so predominant. “Bonjour Cosima.” 

Cosima smiled, blushed even. 

“I think what Cos, here, is trying to say is Hi. Ain’t that right Cos?” Sarah mocked. “Pull up a seat Delphine.” Sarah made sure to sit next to Felix. 

“So Delphine…”Felix smirked, “Cos was telling us you have a boyfriend.” 

“Felix!” Cosima was mortified. 

“Oh really?” Delphine laughed at the growing redness is Cosima’s face. “Well then yes, oui, I do.” 

“And how is that working out for ya?” Sarah felt obliged to ask. 

Delphine had laughed some more, more than likely out of the growing discomfort she was feeling – or that she felt inclined to play along. “We’re an oceans apart.” She replied matter-of-factly. 

“Long distance” Cosima mused, not realizing she had said it louder than anticipated. “Well, this isn’t at all awkward.” She finally let out. 

“Oi knuckle-head” Sarah commented, “Now you’ve just gone and made it ten times more awkward.” 

“You know what would really be awkward” Felix echoed, choking on a little bit of his beer. He was clearly up to no-good. “Asking Delphine here, what it was like kissing Cosima.” 

Both Sarah and Cosima slapped their foreheads respectively in absolute sheer horror that Felix had went there. Of course he went there. Of course it would be Felix that would cross that line and make everyone feel uncomfortable. 

Without skipping a beat, however, Delphine responded to his question, “I liked it very much Felix.” 

Cosima couldn’t quite believe what she just heard, as she looked at the woman beside her with an agonizing pain in her face. She stood up abruptly, and left the bar. Left behind sitting there were three shocked faces.


	12. Douze

Delphine looked at both Sarah and Felix with an awkward yet hopeful anticipation that one of them would suggest what she should do, if anything at all. Felix was doing the best he could to lighten the situation, but it was all just words to Delphine, and she still didn’t know what to do. 

The longer she hadn’t seen Cosima, the more concerned she felt about the whole situation. It dawned on her, with every day that passed when she didn’t see the girl, that she may have overstepped a line. So maybe replying to Felix in that facetious manner crossed every line completely. 

She hadn’t slept all that much after their kiss that sent electric waves of wanting more across her entire body. When the sun crept up, she decided she wasn’t going to put Cosima out any more than she already had, and thought it upon herself to make her own way home. She searched the loft for a pen, until she found one sticking out of an empty beer bottle (mildly amused by it all). 

It was two days before her next shift at the bar, where Delphine had hoped she would run into Cosima. She thought about going upstairs and knocking on her door, but instead took a lot of smoke breaks. Another two days had passed, and still no Cosima. Delphine had even taken on some extra shifts, on the off chance that she may come across her. To no avail though, and it wasn’t until the middle of the following week that Delphine began to realize she was more than likely being avoided. 

Felix was still carrying on with small chat, but Delphine had looked to Sarah for answers. Her eyes pleaded with Sarah’s, as if to tell her she was open to suggestions. Delphine was met with silence though, but she could see Sarah struggle – it wasn’t her place to make those suggestions, and Delphine realized that maybe she didn’t need anyone’s permission to go after Cosima. She wanted to, after all. So she did. 

When Delphine walked outside of Bobby’s bar and into the usual smoking area, there was no Cosima. An all too familiar feeling she had grown accustomed to over the past two weeks. If the girl wanted to avoid her, then what could Delphine possibly do about that? _Give her space_ , she kept telling herself. She looked up at the apartments, and knew she had one of two choices: To go up, or to go back. 

Her heart pounded until the pulse vibrated through her ears; the sensation overcoming her entire body. She knocked on Cosima’s door… _silence_. She knocked again… _silence_. One more time… _silence_. 

“J'en peux plus!” she boldly yelled in frustration at the door. 

“What did the door ever do to you?” she heard from behind the door, knowing that to be Cosima’s voice. 

A smile crept upon Delphine’s face, encouraged by Cosima’s response. “It won’t let me in.” She replied. 

A couple of seconds had passed before the loft door finally slid open, revealing Cosima who was now wearing a red & black satin robe – almost kimono like. Her dreadlocks were tucked into a bun, and she wasn’t wearing her glasses. Her eyes were puffy, and Delphine could immediately tell that she had been crying. It caused her heart to shrink at the thought that she had any part in making this woman sad, upset, or cry. 

“You’ve been crying” her voice was concerned, and filled with worry. 

Cosima shrugged her shoulders, and moved to the side to allow Delphine inside the loft. 

“What have I done wrong Cosima?” It seemed like minutes of silence has passed before she finally allowed herself to ask this question. She wanted to know how to fix whatever it was she had done wrong. 

But she saw the way Cosima was struggling to answer the question, as her eyes had darted left and right, and every which way imaginable. They looked at everything but Delphine, and once again there was only silence. 

The ache that showed over Cosima’s face, her entire body for that matter, it caused Delphine to struggle internally herself. The last thing she ever wanted was to find a new friend in this brave new world, and then ruin it the way she had. Kissing Cosima that night/morning, was probably the most enjoyable sensation she had felt in long time – a sensation of warmth and feeling at home: like there was no other place in the entire universe that she was supposed to be, than there in that moment with Cosima. She acted on impulse, and now she was facing the consequences of those actions. 

She wanted to know what had happened from that kiss, to having Cosima hold her all night, to this moment right now – what went wrong. Where did it go wrong? Was everything not how she thought it was? She thought everything was fine, that it was okay. Cosima did kiss her back, and then she did hold her all night. 

Delphine looked back at Cosima with begging eyes; begging to be given some answers. But nothing. The girl said nothing. Her lip was quivering as if she were holding back a waterfall of tears, and in this moment there was nothing more that Delphine could do. 

She leapt forward, and pulled the smaller woman into a tight embrace, before leaning down and hovering her lips over Cosima’s. As much as she wanted to kiss her, though, she instead whispered into her ear, “I’m not going anywhere.” 

Tears from Cosima’s eyes had fallen onto Delphine’s skin, prompting her to hold her tighter. She wanted to show this woman all of the kindness she had; she wanted Cosima to feel the kindness, and feel Delphine’s strength – to take Delphine’s strength. It was hers if she needed it. Whatever was causing so much anguish and pain for Cosima, Delphine wanted to give her everything she possibly could. 

Moments had passed, and Cosima was still tightly tucked into Delphine’s embrace – wrapped in her long arms. “I’m sorry” she finally conceded. 

“Why, ma chérie, why?” Delphine asked. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” She added. 

“I’m a blubbering mess” Cosima responded through mouthful of tears. 

“Nonsense. You’re a blubbering scientist!” Delphine cheekily remarked, causing Cosima to laugh and smile. Two things Dephine had desperately wanted to see again. 

Cosima had pulled away from Delphine’s embrace, and led her to the sofa in the middle of the loft. They both sat down, and Cosima found comfort back into Delphine’s arms. 

“I’ve just come out of a really bad break up Delphine, and I…” she looked at Delphine nervously, “I just can’t deal with another messy situation.” 

It made sense. After all, she did have a boyfriend back home. Maybe her idea of spontaneity and going with what may, was all a little too much for Cosima. “Then it is I who needs to apologize Cosima. I shouldn’t have kissed you.” 

“It’s not that I didn’t enjoy it…” 

“I know.” 

“It’s just that you have a boyfriend…” 

“I know.” 

“And, my last relationship was just a shit-fest.” 

“Shit felt?” Delphine looked puzzled at how one word could mean several different things. 

Cosima laughed. “Why do you have to be so adorable?” 

Delphine lifted Cosima’s chin, so her eyes had once again met hers. There was something there. There was a lightness, and a darkness. There was happiness and sadness. But there was something there. Her heart felt it, and she knew Cosima felt it too. She could see Cosima felt it too. 

“Cosima, I am really sorry that I have a boyfriend back home…and I am really sorry you are going through a heartbreak…” She paused, but she knew she had to say it, “but… every time I am with you I feel every part of my body telling me that if I don’t kiss you…if I don’t kiss you now, then I am a fool.” 

Cosima’s lips had hastily and hungrily met Delphine’s, as all caution was now being thrown to the wind.


	13. Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where the M rating comes in and if this isn't your cup of tea, you might want to wait for the next chapter.

Her lips were met with as much anticipation and hunger as her own. She could feel a smile forming at the corner of Delphine’s mouth, with each moment their kiss lingered. Hands were clinging to skin, to clothes - pulling and pinching, as both women wanted to feel each other, comfort each other, and be close to one another. 

Cosima’s head was in a spin; her stomach rampant with somersaulting butterflies. The desire she felt for this woman was completely new: a desire she had never felt or known before. Instead of questioning it, like she wanted to, she gave in – because kissing Delphine was more than just electric. It was as though she could feel her soul. 

She felt Delphine’s hands slip under her robe, tracing along Cosima’s stomach causing an immediate reaction. Cosima shivered, and good-bumps appeared, but Delphine didn’t stop. Cosima broke away from their kiss, and Delphine inadvertently bit her own lower lip – almost mischievously. They both stared, and gazed, and pondered, and wondered. 

“I want you.” Delphine almost begged. 

Hearing those words, and that husky tone of Delphine’s, evoked arousal throughout her body. She couldn’t quite believe this moment, but at the same time she simply wanted to go with it. Cosima stood up abruptly, and took Delphine’s hand to lead her away from the sofa and into her bedroom. As they got into her bedroom, Cosima boldly de-robed, and throwing it onto the floor. 

Delphine stood their stunned, and in awe, marveling what was hidden beneath Cosima’s clothing. She quickly followed Cosima’s lead, and started pulling and peeling off her own clothes – both women standing before each other in only their undergarments. 

There were nerves floating through Cosima, but a stillness and calming sensation as well. This moment felt right. Delphine felt right. Her pale skin was elegant, only made even more beautiful by the lilac lace bra, and matching underwear. It suited and complimented her already beautiful body. She took her hand, wanting desperately to feel that connection again, and immediately it was there. With her other hand, she took to Delphine’s chin, drawing her closer until their bodies met. Delphine leans over, and Cosima leans in – their lips meet again, and their tongues dance. 

Her nipples were the first to react, the second Delphine sucked on Cosima’s lower lip, only matched by an equally loud moan. Delphine sucked harder, and Cosima’s fingers dug deep into the blonde’s hips, unintentionally pulling Delphine’s hips into her own. Heat was radiating between both bodies, in every direction. She could feel Delphine’s heat with her own, as no doubt it intertwined and combined. 

Cosima thrusted her body into Delphine’s, ensuring that the other woman’s body would land on her bed. She straddled Delphine’s body, and playfully intertwined their fingers together as she traced them along her own thighs. Delphine’s hands moved closer to where Cosima’s heat was radiating from between her legs, and she could see the look of hunger in her eyes. With one quick move, Cosima threw Delphine’s hands off of her, and she crept down to situate her body between Delphine’s legs…watching the other woman react simultaneously by widening her legs. 

Her head between Delphine’s legs, she slowly grazed her mouth across the woman’s center. She could feel how warm it was, and she wanted nothing more than to ravish this woman with her tongue. Delphine had whimpered, not holding back on being audible. 

“Please…” she begged again. 

Cosima took to Delphine’s underwear, pulling it to its side, she nuzzled her nose into her mons and could feel the slickness – the wetness – of this woman. Delphine’s moans becoming wilder, as Cosima began to lick her pulsating clit. She could feel her own body throbbing with each back and forth motion, with each thrust of Delphine’s core into her face – her mouth, craving and crying out for more. 

It was like she knew what Delphine wanted – soft, slow, and gentle then fast, sharp and hard. Her body erratic by now, and Cosima couldn’t get enough of her, of her scent, and of the way she tasted. Her mouth filled with Delphine, and there was no other place she wanted to be. There was no other lover she wanted to be with. 

Her mouth taking all of Delphine in, she continued to lick and suck, and Delphine’s body began to shake. She was close and Cosima was about to tip her over the edge. Her finger teased Delphine’s entrance, slipping gently and with ease, inside, causing the blonde to cry out in ecstasy. Her body jerked and rocked back and forth into Cosima’s mouth, until her mind, body and soul exploded, sending shock-waves throughout. 

Cosima cold taste and feel Delphine’s orgasm, and it felt earth-shattering as cliché as that might sound. She enjoyed the sensation and continued to slowly lick against the other woman’s pulsation. Her body jerked hastily with every touch, the sensation becoming too sensitive. Cosima took the hint, and slowly crept up next to Delphine. 

They were at eye level, and she could have sworn Delphine’s eyes became an intoxicating green rather than their usual hazel color. She took hold of Delphine’s hand, who in turned rested it on her chest. She felt the woman’s heart rate turn from a fast thumping pound, to a gentler rhythm. It was nice…this. She felt nice. She felt sweet, and smooth, and soft. But mostly she felt like she was going to change Cosima’s life. 

Or at the very least, turn her world upside down.


	14. Quatorze

There was a smile on her face, even when she slept, and it in turn caused Delphine to smile. She liked the idea of a satisfied lover, as they had spent the last three hours in bed being intimate with one another. Exploring Cosima's body was new, not just because she was a woman, but more because she hadn’t been with anyone else in a very long time. It was soft, it was enjoyable, and she wanted to be close immediately after every orgasm she felt, or that she led Cosima to having. Hearing her moans of ecstasy, sent Delphine’s mind into an orgasm. The simple thought of the last three hours was sending her mind into an orgasm, again. 

The girl next to her had murmured and stirred a little bit, before her eyes lazily started opening. A groggy ‘hey your still here’ had been spoken, to which Delphine eagerly nodded and took the girls hand in her own. 

As much as she was enjoying this moment, she also couldn’t help but think about Olivier. He was a nice enough boy, with whom she had known for a very long time. Her family adored him, her friends adored him, and she adored him – but there was always something missing. Everything was easy with him, and they never had any confrontation or fights. It was the perfect relationship, and the sex was okay, the physical chemistry was there, and he was a good conversationalist. He was successful, good looking, and has everything going for him - and everything was _easy_ , which somewhat unnerved her. They spoke of marriage, and wanting children (he wanted children, but she said she hadn’t given it much thought). He tried to propose a couple of times, but Delphine always made a comical joke of it and told him to get up off his knees and stop living in the 50s, only to concede defeat a little with adding that when the time is right for both of them, they would get married. 

She didn’t want to get married though, and she didn’t want children. She didn’t want the perfect life, with the perfect house with the white picket fence. She wanted a lover, an intellectual equal, a partner in life through good times and the equally bad times. She wanted to be challenged and have her ideas challenged. Most of all though, she wanted to know that when she woke up that the first person she saw was the person she last thought of. 

Olivier was a good person, and everything was telling her that she was going to end up with him. It wasn’t a bad thought, and Delphine knew she could be happy with him. She was happy with him. Cosima, on the other hand though, excited Delphine physically and emotionally. 

Her presence was always felt when Delphine was working at the bar. She knew when her eyes were upon her, and Delphine had wanted to know more about this woman. The fact that Bobby seemed to know her, was all the invitation Delphine needed to ask questions about her. Truthfully, she knew Cosima’s name before she was introduced to her that day, by Felix. Bobby had let slip that both Felix and Cosima were gay, which Delphine then wondered if those eyes she felt upon her from the dreadlocked girl, had been eyes of lust. Whatever it was, it never faltered, and every single time that Cosima was in that bar, Delphine felt it. 

And in this moment, with her next to her naked, she felt it. She felt this moment in words that could not be described. There was a magnetism about this girl, and it sent her mind into a spin. 

“I can hear you thinking” A sleepy Cosima had spoken 

Delphine smiled as she looked down towards her lover, “Oui. I am contemplative.” 

Cosima rolled over onto her back, exposing her naked front – the sheets had only covered her lower half. She grabbed her glasses from the nightstand, and put them on. “Sounds serious.” 

“I’ve never understood the term love-making before.” The blonde responded. “But with you, I understand it completely.” 

Her words were not forced, and it all naturally came out of her mouth. But that was the thing with Cosima, for Delphine, everything did seem natural. The way their eyes met, the way their bodies reacted, the way they kissed – none of it forced, or out of a hunger for something that wasn’t true. Delphine had said it, the second she met Cosima that she had felt she knew this girl in another lifetime, and that somehow their souls had danced in another life. 

“Delphine, I feel it too.” Cosima stated as the warmth in her glowing eyes radiated upon Delphine. 

Those eyes were melting Delphine, who could see herself very consumed by them and her. Maybe their souls were connected now, and maybe the pull that Delphine had felt for ‘something more’, was her soul’s way of finding that connection. She had never given the thought of fate or destiny any attention, as she preferred to believe in what was now and present – but, there was always that pull to something else, for all of those years, even though she had everything she could hope for or wanted. 

It suddenly dawned on her that she was no longer feeling that need for something more. “Merde!” She exclaimed. 

Cosima’s face scrunched up at the sudden, and out of nowhere, expression. “Are you okay?” 

“Oui, yes sorry” she lied. 

“Delphine, please talk to me.” The brunette could see through her dishonesty. 

Delphine paused and contemplated on how to respond to her. Of course she wanted to be as honest as she could be with this woman, but what was she going to say when she didn’t even know – truly know what was happening herself? “I should go.” She responded with, instead. 

“Not until you talk to me” the girl pleaded, begged even. 

“I’m just…” she started, then paused, and trembled, all as she tried to find the right words to say “…feeling a lot of emotions right now.” 

“Okay” Cosima conceded. She knew she probably wasn’t going to get more than that out of this woman right now. “Don’t ever be afraid to speak your truth to me, Delphine. I’d never judge you.” 

She wanted to say more to Cosima. She wanted to tell her that she had never felt so amazing, and so warm, and so happy then in this moment with her. She wanted to say all of those things, and tell her that this connection that she feels for and to her, is so strong. That maybe their happenstance was more about two souls trying to find each other, but saying and musing those words to herself made it ever the more clear on how completely absurd she was sounding. So instead, she remained silent. 

Silent and confused. 

And aroused.


	15. Fifteen

She wasn’t going to force Delphine, or push her, to say anything she wasn’t ready for. Though, she could see the internal struggle that Delphine was having with herself. Her composure was different; slumped and dreary. To Cosima, however, she still looked sexy as hell and wanted every inch of her. 

In one swift move, Cosima straddled Delphine, and brought her lips up to meet the brunette’s. They kissed with a hunger; a desire. Her tongue lingered over Delphine’s bottom lip, slightly and softly tracing along the outer. A soft moan crept from the blonde’s mouth, and Cosima crashed her mouth harder into Delphine’s. 

Delphine suddenly broke from the kiss, and gave Cosima a mischievous smile. She pouted, of course, as her craving for this woman was becoming rampant. But her arms were being held above her head, as Delphine was now in control. Her lips hurried to Cosima’s neck, and she softly bit down mimicking an earlier action of Cosima’s that drove Delphine stir-crazy, and as excepted it had the same effect on the girl with the strange and peculiar hair. 

Cosima let out a pleasurable yelp, her body now in sensitive over-drive. She brought Delphine’s hand up to cover her left breast, squeezing down, and Delphine took her thumb and circled over Cosima’s hardened nipple. With that same hand moments ago upon her breast, she guided down between her thighs, and slid between her center. Both girls simultaneously letting out moans, sighs, and other pleasurable sounds. 

Her hips thrusted into Delphine’s fingers, and she brought her own hand down to graze over her now pulsating clitoris. She felt herself about to explode, the pure pleasure of ecstasy she was feeling in this moment, never quite experienced before. This woman she hardly knew, yet felt she knew completely, was turning her insides into an exploding firework. Delphine had brought her face down to meet hers, and she knew she wanted to see Cosima – she wanted to watch her, see her eyes, when she came. Delphine growled something in French, Cosima couldn’t quite make out what it was; too absorbed in the movement of the woman’s fingers inside of her, thrusting her, fucking her repeatedly. Cosima bucked her hips, and her entire body had come undone. The room filled with her cries and moans of her orgasm; a hard release that her body was now consumed by. 

“Holy shit” she finally breathed out

Delphine smiled at the girl lazily slumped on top of her still. She placed a kiss on top of her nose, then to her left cheek, then her right. “Je suis sous le charme.” 

Her lips met Delphine’s again, but a much softer kiss ensued. “What does that mean?” 

“It means…” she started, placing another soft kiss on the girl’s nose, “I am” another kiss on her left cheek, “under” then on her right cheek, “a charm.” 

Her heart was fluttering at the woman’s sweet words. The way she said them was more of a declaration, but the way she looked at Cosima had set her heart melting. 

Cosima found a burst of energy, and slid from Delphine’s body, back next to her. “I need a smoke after that.” 

“And I should go home” Delphine stated, bringing Cosima’s hand up to her mouth and placing soft kisses all over the back of her hand. 

“But I don’t want you to!” Cosima pouted. 

Delphine grinned, “Cheeky. But I must.” 

Cosima sighed, “Fine. But let me drive you….please.” 

Delphine didn’t hesitate, “Okay.” 

An hour had passed, and both girls freshened up and were on their way to Delphine’s off-campus flat that she shared with her friend Alison. Delphine had mentioned a few stories of her friendship with Alison, and how they came to be where they are today. Alison was originally from America, but traveled abroad to study in France, and now she was studying for her Masters here on a scholarship (better known as a fellowship). This Alison character intrigued Cosima to no-end, she seemed full of focus whereas Delphine appeared carefree and the live-for-the-moment type. But as Delphine continued telling more stories of her and Alison, it struck Cosima that maybe Delphine was a different person back in France, then the Delphine she is now. 

“I barely know you Delphine.” The words had left her mouth harsher than she had intended. 

Delphine frowned a little, not wanting to let go of the bubble she and Cosima had created. “I know.” 

“Do you think maybe we should get to know each other?” 

“I thought this is what we are doing” The blonde had tightly squeezed the brunette’s hand. “Oui?” 

Cosima unintentionally bit her lower lip, lost in concentration. She was concentrating on the road, and also the past two weeks. Everything was a whirlwind of emotions, and she didn’t want this to be another _Shay_. “What we’ve been doing is having sex, Delphine.” 

There was a bitter truth to those words, and all Delphine could do was sigh. 

“Why did you come over here?” Cosima asked. 

“I already told you and your friends…” Delphine paused, “I can’t explain it…I’m here because this is where my heart led me.” 

They arrived at the front of Delphine’s flat that she shared with Alison, and Cosima turned off the engine. She wanted to ask more questions, but she also didn’t want to come on too strong. After all, it was obvious that this girl like Cosima, and hopefully was going to stick around long enough to find out everything there is to know. 

Delphine placed her hand atop of Cosima’s cheek, which she fell into with comfort. The warmth of her hand, resting on her cheek, was soothing – reassuring even. Any doubts that she had, were swept away in that instant. 

“Do you want to come up?” Delphine softly asked. 

Cosima looked surprised. She hadn’t expected to be asked to come in, after all. “Sure. But won’t Alison be home?” 

Delphine nodded. 

“What does or doesn’t she know?” She asked nervously. 

“I have told her that you are my new friend.” Delphine responded cautiously. 

“Okay.” 

“You’re upset?” 

Cosima’s eyes said more than her actual words. “No, it’s just…” 

Delphine took Cosima’s hand into her own again, “This…between us...has only just started” She said reassuringly. “Let it happen au naturel, oui?” 

Cosima smiled and nodded. Delphine was right. Of course she was right. What more could she expect from this woman, when they had only just started discovering each other. This wasn’t going to be another _Shay_ …Delphine was different. 

Delphine felt different.


End file.
